Pyroland Daydream Universal Translator

This sleek, grey-paneled ushanka features a functional-looking microphone boom to ensure your war cries are heard loud and clear. It comes complete with a permanent, shimmering spectral companion and a vivid rainbow arc that trails behind you like a magical exhaust pipe. It is the perfect choice for mercenaries who want to keep their ears warm while broadcasting their delusions of grandeur to the entire battlefield.